


15 Days of New Year's Drabbles

by snowbunnylester (xrosepetalsx)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 15 days of drabbles, M/M, celebrating the new year
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-01
Updated: 2015-01-15
Packaged: 2018-03-04 17:04:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 12,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3075023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xrosepetalsx/pseuds/snowbunnylester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>15 days of Phan Drabbles to celebrate the New Year as requested by you! Individual warnings by chapter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Okay, so you guy’s  _really_  liked the 30 day’s of Phan drabbles I did a few months ago, and I know a lot of you wanted me to do it again, so here I am bringing you:

**15 Days of New Year’s Drabbles**

**Starting tomorrow at 6pm Pacific Time, I’ll be posting a drabble a day for 15 days!**  

But I’m going to need your help, so do me a favor and  **drop by my[ask](http://insanityplaysfics.tumblr.com/ask) box ASAP - OR HERE IN THE COMMENTS - to prompt me a drabble!**

Try and keep in mind that a drabble is under 1,000 words and prompt accordingly.

Once I hit 15 prompts, my ask box will be closed for a short period to discourage more prompts. Or in the case of the comments here, I may just have to tell you that I'll save the prompt for something else.

In the meantime, **HAPPY NEW YEARS** and I'll see you guys tomorrow!


	2. I'm Bi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan comes out to his parents, but it doesn’t go to plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil.
> 
>  _Prompt_ : Dan gets kicked out for his house (for however long you want to work with/have it be) after getting into a fight with his parents (I don't mind how. Sexuality or uni thing ect. Anything you want!) But Phil is there to cheer him up and make things a little bit better.
> 
> Hey guys, look, I’m back for 15 days straight! I’m sure you’ll all eventually get sick of me. Track the tag 15 days of new years drabbles for updates, and in the meantime, please enjoy day 1!
> 
> I was actually writing a different prompt when it turned into a response to yours Sinncity, so thank you and I hope you like it.
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

Dan feels like he shouldn’t really be surprised at this point, that this keep’s happening to him, and yet he is. He is surprised. He’s hurt.

In fact, if he’s being really honest with himself, he’s devastated.

The last thing he’d been expecting when he’d come out to his parents was to be rejected. Even less so to be kicked out.

His parents were lovely, open-minded people. They’d known for years that Dan’s best friend, Phil, was gay, and they’d never batted an eye about him…and yet –

And yet.

Maybe it was different when it was their own son, Dan supposed.

Or maybe it was just the term he’d used.

Dan was bi.

Maybe they thought he was a slut. Maybe they thought he couldn’t make up his mind. Maybe that was the reason they were upset. Dan couldn’t say that that was a new response.

Like he’d said, he really shouldn’t be surprised. This wasn’t the first time he’d come out, and it wouldn’t be the last. He’d heard it all; every nasty, derogatory thing someone could possibly have to say about him, and he’d survived. He’d survive this time as well.

So he drags himself, dripping wet, to his boyfriend’s house. It’s raining. His hands are jammed into his jacket pockets, but the thin hoodie does nothing to keep him warm.

His phone is somewhere back at home. Phil’s parents hate when he shows up unannounced, but he figures they’ll understand just this once.

He’s on their door step now, and it’s too late anyway, so he knocks, shivering in the cold. He thinks the shock might be wearing off now, because there’s definitely something warm dripping down his face, and it’s not the rain.

Mrs. Lester opens the door.

“Dan?” she asks, and then she gasps when she realizes exactly what state he’s in. “Come in, come in darling, let me get you a towel!” she exclaims, quickly ushering Dan inside.

“Phil! Get down here, now! Dan’s here!” she shouts up the stairs, rushing around the corner to the linen closet. Dan doesn’t move from the entryway, dripping rain water all over the floor. Phil’s mum returns with a large, fluffy white towel. She doesn’t bother handing it to him, just rushes forward to mother him.

The tears start to come faster at that, and Mrs. Lester tuts when she notices, dropping the towel in favor of wrapping him up in a tight hug.

Dan can’t help but hug her back, tiny little gasps escaping from his mouth. Dan can hear Phil rushing downstairs.

“Mum? Dan?” Phil asks, and Dan looks up, clearly able to see the concern etched on his boyfriend’s face. He chokes on another sob, and buries his face back into Mrs. Lester’s shoulder.

“Take Dan upstairs and get him into the shower, Phil,” Mrs. Lester commands, releasing Dan only to bundle him up in the tower and pass him off to Phil. Phil complies, pulling Dan into his side and rushing him up the stairs. As soon as the bathroom door closes behind them, Dan collapses into Phil’s arms.

“Phil, Phil, Phil…” he moans into the crook of his boyfriend’s neck, and then he’s really crying. Tears are dripping down his face, quickly soaking into Phil’s t-shirt, but neither boy minds. Phil clutches Dan tighter to him.

“It’s going to be okay Dan…It’s going to be okay,” Phil promises.

\--

It takes Dan at least 15 minutes to calm down, but when he does, he allows Phil to ease him down onto the closed toilet seat.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Phil asks.

“My parents kicked me out,” Dan croaks in response, and Phil nods his head in acknowledgement.

“You told them?” he asks, and Dan nods his head in response.

“They didn’t take it well.”

“I gathered,” Phil huffs in response, and then he gets down on one knee in order to kneel in front of Dan.

“But I meant what I said earlier, Dan. It’s going to be alright. You still have me, and I promise I’m not going anywhere. I love you,” he says.

Dan manages a smile for him, and moves forward to hug him. “I love you too,” he mumbles into his neck. “I really do.”

They pull away.

“Okay, let’s get you out of these wet clothes, shall we?” Phil says with a playful wink, and Dan reaches up to playfully smack him back.

 _Yeah_ , Dan thinks, as he stands up, _things are going to be okay._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still in need of prompts, so send them here!


	3. Drunk Kisses on New Years

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan hates parties, but kissing a drunk Phil at midnight on New Year’s makes this one a little more bearable. **Alchohol**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil.
> 
>  _Prompt_ : New Year's Eve kiss
> 
> Two New Years related prompts coming your way these next two days. I hope you enjoy this thatrandomgirl!
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

The truth was, Dan really kind of hated parties. He only ever went to satisfy his friends, or, most recently, to satisfy his boyfriend, Phil. Phil wasn’t a party animal, per se, but he was definitely a people person – a popular person – and he had a lot of friends (and by a lot, Dan meant _a lot_ , but he supposes that’s what he gets for dating a graduate student).

Having a lot of friends in University also meant maintaining those friendships, and what’s the best way to maintain a friendship at University? Going to parties.

So that’s where Dan was on New Year’s Eve, waiting for the clock to strike 12 while his boyfriend wondered around half drunk. Dan, on the other hand, was 100% sober, and surrounded by drunk people.

He gagged when someone _reeking_ of alcohol wondered past, and prayed that Phil would come find him soon. They might be forced to stay at this dreadful place until New Years, but at least then Dan wouldn’t have to spend it alone.

“Hey mate, up for a another drink?” a guy suddenly asked as he wondered by Dan, smiling that smile you only get when you were off your rocker.

“No thanks,” Dan mumbled back, glancing away in order to break the eye contact he’d accidentally initiated in the first place. The drunk thankfully stumbled away, and Dan breathed a sigh of relief.

After a few more minutes of standing around, Dan decided to attempt to move away from the tiny corner he’d crammed himself into hours earlier, but found it was easier said than done when a tiny blonde rammed right into him, sending his full glass flying and covering both of them in the sticky mess of alcohol.

“Watch where you’re going, freak!” the girl yelled, stomping away without waiting for so much as an apology. Dan counted himself lucky he hadn’t been slapped, and glanced down at his now ruined shirt. Knowing it was futile, Dan still attempted to unsuccessfully wipe away the stickiness now coating his shirt.

With another heavy sigh, Dan gave up, finally maneuvering his way into a hallway that would hopefully lead him to a bathroom.

\--

It was 11:45, and Dan had just finished cleaning up. His shirt was at least wearable – for now.

“Hey, has anyone seen Dan Howell around?” a voice called over the blaring music, and Dan looked over quickly, trying to find the source of the sound.

“I’m Dan Howell!” Dan shouted back, pushing through the masses of people until he’d run into a guy much taller than both him.

“Phil’s looking for you,” the guy said, giving Dan a quick once over before quirking his eye. “Only I have no idea why,” he added, and then he was gone.

“What the fuck, you didn’t even tell me where he is, you asshole,” Dan grumbled to himself. Sighing, Dan pushed back through the crowd, occasionally tapping people on the shoulder and asking if they knew Phil.

It was five minutes to midnight before Dan finally got a positive answer.

“Have you seen Phil?”

“Yeah, he’s down by the pool! I wouldn’t count your luck though – apparently he’s already got a New Year’s Kiss in mind!” a red-headed girl reported with a giggle, attaching herself to Dan’s arm with flirty eyes.

Disgruntled, Dan wormed his way out of her grip and shot over his shoulder “Yeah, me!”

He didn’t have to look to know she’d have a scandalized look on her face, but Dan was used to it. No one was expecting popular Phil to be dating a scrawny nobody like Dan.

He headed down to the pool.

Dan wasn’t even out of the doorway before he’d spotted the dark haired head of his boyfriend. In fact, Dan was seeing a lot more of his boyfriend than he’d like to right now, what with him being stripped down to his pants and all, and he made his way to his side with a dark look on his face.

The minute the girls swooning over Phil caught sight of Dan, they were off, scurrying away to bother someone else’s boyfriend, probably. Dan’s glare didn’t lessen. Phil turned around.

“Heeeey, bear, I’ve been – I’ve been looking all over fer yoooou!” Phil drunkenly slurred, barreling into Dan’s arms without warning. Dan caught him with a startled “oof!”

“Yeah, yeah,” he added in response, trying to battle away the trail of kisses Phil was leaving against his throat.

“Get off me, you big oaf!” Dan growled, finally managing to pull Phil away enough to look him in the eye. “Care to explain why you’re half naked?”

Phil stared at him, uncomprehending, before looking down and realizing his undressed state. “Oh…Oh! Oh yah! We were – we were playin’ a gaaaaaame, Dan!” Phil stated triumphantly. “And I think…I tink I was los – losting!”

“Right,” Dan confirmed, rolling his eyes as he scanned the pool area for Phil’s clothes. Finally, he found them in a heap a few feet away from Phil just as the house erupted into a countdown.

“OOOH DAN! DAN, IT’S ALMOST – ALMOST MIDNIGHT!” Phil crowed, hopping up and down and grabbing onto Dan’s arm. Dan shook him off, grabbing Phil’s clothes and thrusting them into his arms.

All around them, the countdown soared in sound until it was almost defining. Everyone in the backyard had officially joined in, and Phil was struggling to yank his pants on and count.

He had one foot in when he finally gave up, dropping the rest of his clothes into a heap on the ground.

“Dan, Dan come ‘eeeeeeere,” Phil hissed, beckoning Dan to join him, and his face was so cute that Dan couldn’t ignore it.

“10, 9, 8, 7!”

Phil wrapped his arms around Dan’s waist and nuzzled into his neck.

“6, 5, 4, 3!”

Dan reached up to loop his arms around Phil’s neck.

“2, 1, happy New Year!”

Phil pressed his body flush up against Dan’s, and then they were kissing, lips pressed together messily until Dan pulled away and fixed it, sliding their lips together sensuously. Phil’s hands were gripping his hips like he was trying to hold on, and Dan was grinning into the kiss, because for once, he was in charge, and there was nothing Phil could do but melt into it.

When Dan finally pulled away, it was with a giddy grin, because for once, it was Phil who appeared dazed.

 _Yeah_ , Dan thought, _this is definitely going to be a good year._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just need 5 more prompts, so comment here!


	4. I Like You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Phil spend New Year’s alone, but, blowing way past tipsy, Dan finds his inhibitions low enough to confess. **Alchohol**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : Dan and Phil are celebrating New Years alone and they get a little drunk and they confess their feelings for each other and maybe make it super fluffy.
> 
> I’m starting to think I never give you guys what you were actually hoping for, as this is less fluffy and more…kind of gentle, idk. Sorry, but I really hope you like this Jordan_LaCroix!
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

Dan will swear up and down that he’s only a _little bit tipsy_ , but Phil’s almost certain that’s not true. For the last twenty minutes, Dan had been taking swigs pretty steadily from their bottle of red wine, and though Phil knew Dan wasn’t a lightweight, there was no way he could ingest that much alcohol without being more than just _tipsy_.

He supposed it didn’t matter, in the long run. Tonight was New Year’s eve, and in just a few minutes, the clock would strike midnight. No one else was around to see Dan make a fool of himself, and Dan had enough blackmail on Phil to prevent him from saying anything, so there really was no problem. Besides, they were both mature enough adults, over the legal drinking age, and just trying to have a bit of fun before the year ended. And maybe to begin the year as well.

“Hey…hey, Phil?”

“Yeah, Dan?”

“Do you think maybe we shoulda’ had a party?”

“Nah.”

“Okay then.”

The TV’s blaring lines from some stupid comedy, but otherwise, the apartment is pretty silent. Through the walls, both boys can hear the steady chanting of people counting down the seconds to midnight.

Dan is settled comfortably on the couch cushions, with Phil leaning against its side by his feet.

The chanting ends and screams and cheers erupt all around them. Dan takes another swig of alcohol and hands it down to Phil.

“Cheers!” he crows with a happy little snort.

“Cheers!” Phil echoes, handing the bottle of wine back to an overly eager Dan. He takes it with another happy crow, swinging the nearly empty bottle back and chugging the remnants of alcohol that remain.

“Hey!” Phil protests, but his head has started to swim pleasantly, and he doesn’t really care. Dan laughs.

“Hay is for horses. Are you a horse Phil?” he asks. Phil snorts.

“Noooo, I hate horses,” he mumbles back, allowing his head to loll back onto the couch. His vision is upside down now, and it’s kind of uncomfortable in that it’s making him dizzy, so he closes his eyes and takes a deep breathe.

“Happy new year, Dan,” he mumbles, suddenly sleepy, and tries to roll over. A hand on his shoulder stops him, and he blinks his eyes open, trying to force away the heavy haze that covers them.

“Woah, there big boy, careful!” Dan teases. “Happy new year, Phil,” he continues, and his face is soft in a way that’s almost uncharacteristic of Dan. He’s looking at Phil with a tenderness Phil has never seen before, and so Phil flops over, now sitting on his knees with his chin propped up on the couch.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” he asks, and his words are much more straight forward than they might usually be. He blinks his eyes owlishly at Dan, and tilts his head, waiting for an answer that doesn’t come. Dan just stares at him, lips quirked in a fond way.

Phil’s eyes start to feel heavy again, so he closes them, reaching up to hold his head up with his hand. His previous question lay forgotten in the air, and he sighs again in blissful thought of sleep.

“Because I like you,” Dan says, and Phil blinks his eyes open in confused surprise.

“What are you talking about?” he asks, rolling over so he’s finally, officially, laying on the floor. Dan climbs off the couch to join him, stepping over Phil and laying down next to him.

“I was looking at you because I like you,” Dan repeats himself, and Phil rolls his neck to stare at Dan instead of the ceiling.

“When were you looking at me?” Phil asks, now incredibly confused. “And I like you too. You’re my best friend,” Phil continues. Dan stares at him, a quirk to his lips.

“Not like that, you idiot. I like you, like you. Like…properly so,” he says, rolling his own head so he’s staring at Phil as well. Phil blinks at him, and then he laugh, rolling with it until he’s flush up against Dan’s side.

“Yeah?” Phil asks, a giddy smile on his face.

“Yeah,” Dan confirms, reaching out to wrap his arm around Phil’s waist.

“For real?” Phil continues, eyes wide in earnestness.

“For real,” Dan says back, moving in close.

“You’re not just fucking with me because you’re drunk, are you?” Phil says, and this time he’s angry, attempting to pull away from his best friend.

“Of course not!” Dan assures, and then, when Phil stops resisting, adds “I’d never do that.”

“Okay then,” Phil confirms, settling more firmly into Dan’s side and nuzzling his face into his neck.

“Okay then?” Dan questions.

“Okay then,” Phil says again, and the way his breathe ghosts across Dan’s neck makes the other boy laugh.

“Okay then,” Dan finally repeats, reaching up to tuck his fingers under Phil’s chin and pull him in.

“I’m going to kiss you now,” he says, and when Phil doesn’t respond, he leans in to press his chapped lips up against his best friend’s. Their lips slide together softly, and it’s a wonderful feeling to finally kiss. Phil makes a sound low in his throat that Dan takes as approval, and he pulls away. Phil doesn’t even have enough time to open his eyes and complain before Dan has moved back in, pressing soft kisses to Phil’s lips in quick succession. Then he moves in one last time and takes the initiative to deepen it, sucking Phil’s bottom lip into his mouth and biting gently. Phil sighs against him, pressing his body more fully against Dan’s, and then finally, finally, Dan releases him.

“You’re cute,” Dan states softly, a whisper blown across Phil’s lips.

“You’re cuter,” Phil replies just as softly, leaning in to capture Dan’s lips in another kiss.

“I like you,” Dan tries again when they pull apart. Phil rolls his eyes fondly, only to whisper “I like you too,” back. They don’t kiss again. Instead, Phil hums happily and pushes himself into Dan’s arms, closing his eyes to finally rest. Dan holds him, and the two drift off to sleep.


	5. Confession - Rejection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan has finally come to terms with his feelings – but now it’s time to make or break them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : where one of them confesses their feelings for the other, but the other doesn't feel the same way.
> 
> Thanks again to thatrandomgirl for the prompt!
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

It’s terrifying, understanding and coming to terms with your own feelings. It’s terrifying because oftentimes, you know there’s nothing you can do. Oftentimes, there are miles and miles of issues standing in your way.

But sometimes it’s just you.

It’s been four years now. Four years of Dan being unwilling to acknowledge the reality of his heart; of being unwilling to confront the truth behind the flirting, and the incriminating dailybooth answers and tweets. It’s been four years of Dan hiding the truth, but now it’s out.

At least to his own mind, it’s out.

And that’s the hardest part, really, because now it really _is_ just Dan standing in his own way. Now it really _is_ Dan’s fault if he sits around and wallows in self-pity.

But it’s still terrifying. It’s terrifying because Dan’s almost certain that Phil doesn’t feel the same way. Dan is almost _certain_ that if he comes out and tells his best friend his feelings, that everything will get awkward.

That nothing will ever be the same again.

And yet he knows that he has to say something, or it’s going to tear him apart. He has to confess, because if he doesn’t, than he’s always be left wondering. It’s better, in his mind, to be rejected – to put an end to the whole thing in one go – then to continue wallowing in unresolved feelings.

So that’s what he does. He stands, huddled in the kitchen, sipping at a mug of coffee, as he waits for Phil to get up. Because it has to be now. It has to be early. It has to be before Dan can chicken out.

“Dan? What are you doing up so early?” a voice calls from behind him, and Dan turns to find himself face to face with a yawning Phil. He smiles, tentative, shy, and runs a hand through his fringe.

He’s not ready for this – he’ll never be ready for this.

“Made you coffee,” he mumbles, for lack of any other words, and shuffles to the side to allow Phil access. Phil smiles, unaware of the turmoil going on in Dan’s heart, and reaches into the cupboard for a mug.

“Thanks,” he says. Dan nods in acceptance, hands clutched around his own mug.

 _It’s now or never_ , he tells himself.

“I need to tell you something,” he starts, and his hands are trembling.

Phil turns slowly, apprehensively. “Oookaaay,” he responds, drawing the vowels out slowly. “What’s up?” he asks, setting down the mug he’d just pulled out.

Dan gulps, and places his own mug down. His face is downcast. He can’t look at Phil.

“I’m in love with you,” he states, and his voice cracks on the l-word. He cringes, stiffening when Phil inhales a gasp.

There’s a pause that Dan can’t interpret, and his heart is racing in his chest. There’s a tiny bubble of hope that Phil might feel the same way, and with every passing second, Dan can’t push it away.

“Oh,” Phil finally says, and the awkwardness in his voice is enough of an answer for Dan. He deflates.

“Yeah,” he says back, and even to his own ears, his voice is hitched and broken – trembling the same way his hands still are. “I just thought you deserved to know…but it’s okay, I’ll get over it,” Dan continues, turning away.

Phil doesn’t stop him as he walks away.

“Yeah…okay,” Dan just catches him say, and his heart is breaking, shattering into a tiny million little pieces all over the kitchen floor. Dan retreats to his bedroom.

He knows it’s painful now, but it was worth it. The worst is over – all that’s left now is to let go of hope and move on.

Maybe, in a few months’ time, they can even be friends again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to stay as realistic as possible to my perception of them as people in this, so I hope this came across well.


	6. Forever and Ever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan comes home drunk, and Phil worries his boyfriend will fly into the depressed rage that usually occurs, only to be pleasantly surprised at the night’s turn of events. **Alcohol**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : so dan gets kinda drunk somehow (however you'd like) and he ends up getting all sleepy and crawling into a relatively sober phil's lap and they cuddle and phil basically just thinks about how cute dan is and how he's like a giant teddy bear. just pour buckets of fluff all over it.
> 
> I’ve legit never seen you guys so unhappy with me after yesterday; thanks to wolvesgomoomoo who sent in the perfect fluff prompt to follow up with! Also, I fucked up your prompt, SO JUST MESSAGE ME AND I PROMISE I’LL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU LIKE. (no, seriously, it ran away from me, and I forgot the second half, AND I’M SO SORRY, I LOVE YOU)
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

Generally speaking, Dan doesn’t get drunk that often. Not anymore at least. Not since he started hanging around Phil, which, let’s be honest, Phil is incredibly grateful for. The few times Phil _had_ seen Dan raging drunk had not been pretty after all, and so when Dan _does_ come home shit faced, Phil finds himself praying that things will not get quite as messy as they have before.

“PHIIIIL!” Dan is calling from downstairs, and Phil heaves himself off of the couch to follow the sound. There’s already a sigh on his lips as he makes his way downstairs, and he’s expecting to find a tear stained Dan with rage in his heart. What he finds instead, however, surprises him.

“Phil!” Dan calls, when he finally catches sight of his boyfriend. There’s a smile painted across his face, and his eyes are cloudy but excited. This is not what Phil had been expecting to see.

“Hi, Dan,” Phil calls back cautiously, making his way down the stairs and to their front door, where Dan has propped himself up as he tries to remove his shoes. “Did you have a fun time with your parents?” Phil asks. Dan nods his head.

“Yes! Dad thought it’d be – be funny to get me drunk!” Dan responds excitedly. “But I told him, I told him Phil wouldn’t like that very much,” Dan continues in an attempt at a hushed whisper, but it just comes out more as a really loud one. He’s giggling now, and that’s how Phil really knows that something’s different this time. Dan never giggles.

Suddenly, Dan is pitching forward, both shoes off as he falls into Phil’s arms. Phil catches him, just barley, and sags under his boyfriend’s weight. Dan giggles again, and Phil’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

“Uh, Dan, how much did you drink?” he asks.

“Just…just a few cups of wine, I promise, Phil!” Dan attempts to reassure him, but Phil is having none of it as he grabs Dan’s shoulders and forces him to not only stand on his own, but look him in the eye.

“How much did you have to drink, bear?” Phil tries again, this time with a softer tone of voice so that Dan will know he’s not mad.

“…a lot,” Dan finally replies, and his eyes look a tiny bit sober for just a moment. Then he’s giggling again, pressing his face into the crook of Phil’s neck and nuzzling it. “But it’s okay, Phil, see! I’m fiiiiiiiine,” he says in a sing song voice. “I promise, I’ll be a good boy tonight…okay?” he asks, pulling away to bat his eyelashes at Phil.

Phil rolls his eyes, unable to help the fond smile slipping onto his lips, and then he’s taking Dan by the shoulders and helping him up the stairs. Dan giggles all the way, and all Phil can think about is the blackmail material, laughing along with him.

When the finally reach the top of the stairs, Phil guides him to the lounge and helps him sit on the couch. Dan slumps sideways almost immediately, giggling and looking up at Phil with mushy eyes.

“I looooove you, Phil!” he coo’s, and Phil chuckles, patting him on the head softly.

“Love you too, Dan. I’m going to go get you a glass of water now, okay?” he asks, waiting for a nod of approval before disappearing into the kitchen.

Dan might be acting giggly and cute for now, but Phil’s still afraid that melancholy, angry Dan will make an appearance tonight; especially if Phil disappears without warning.

Sighing, Phil fetches a glass and runs the tap, filling up the cup as quickly as possible before retrieving some tablets for Dan’s oncoming headache. There’s fear settling in the pit of Phil’s stomach that anything could set off Dan right now, and he hopes to sober him up quickly.

Returning to the lounge with supplies for Dan, Phil finds his boyfriend fast asleep, curled up and snoring on the couch. He smiles, the sight endearing, before putting down the glass and the tablets on the table in front of him. Gently, he kneels beside him and shakes him awake.

“Come on, Dan, I need you to take these. Do you think you can sit up and take these for me?” Phil asks softly, and Dan blinks up at him blearily before nodding in reply. Phil helps him to sip at the water and swallow the tablets, offering him a biscuit to help wash it down, and when he does, feels his heart turn in his chest at the melancholy look stealing over Dan’s face.

Phil sighs, getting up to sit down beside his boyfriend and rub at his shoulders. Dan looks up at him, and his face is so sad that Phil just wants to cuddle him. Slowly, Dan crawls so that his head is in Phil’s lap, and then he rolls so his arms can wrap securely around Phil’s waist. He looks back up at Phil again.

“I love you, Phil,” he states again, sounding more sober this time – only Phil knows it’s just his mood.

“I love you too, Dan. With all my heart,” he promises, staring down at Dan with worried eyes. Then he reaches down and boops his nose, pressing his finger softly against the tip with a sweet smile. “And don’t you forget it,” he teases.

Dan smiles, another giggle escaping his lips, and then he’s letting his eyes slip closed.

“I really, really love you, Phil,” he says this time, cuddling closer into Phil’s stomach. Phil reaches down to run his fingers through Dan’s soft curls, relishing in the contented sigh that gets him from Dan.

“And you’re all mine…forever…and ever…” Dan continues to mumble, until finally, he’s fast asleep. All Phil can do is grin.

“Forever, and ever,” he answers, leaning down carefully to whisper the words into a sleeping Dan’s ear. “Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently I forgot what the fuck fluff is because I’ve been too busy working harder on inserting back story and plot into my drabbles. I HOPE IT MADE UP FOR YESTERDAY ANYWAY!


	7. Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil once again finds himself lost in a shopping center, and has to find a security guard to help him get back to Dan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : Please make a drabble where Phil got lost in the mall while they are shopping kay thanks uwu
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

One minute, Dan and Phil are at each other’s sides in the shopping center, and the next, Phil is gone.

“Hey, Phil, did you see that – Phil?” Dan asks the moment he notices, spinning in place and scanning his immediate surroundings in search of his best friend. “Where have you gone off to now?” he mutters to himself, pulling out his phone to check in.

He hits speed dial, the cute, but derpy picture Dan had taken of Phil a few months ago popping up on his screen. He brings it to his ear and waits, but there’s no answer.

The call almost immediately goes to voice mail, and Dan curses to himself in annoyance.

“Damnit, Phil,” he mutters, taking another quick glance around his surroundings before beginning to backtrack, wondering if maybe, just maybe, Phil had gotten side tracked somewhere back _there_.

\--

Really, it shouldn’t come as any surprise to Phil that he’s managed to get himself separated from Dan. Especially considering there in a new place, and Phil has literally _no_ sense of direction. He could be 5 feet from his own apartment building and still turn and walk the other way if he happens to not know where he is.

Dan knows this. Phil knows this. Practically the whole _world_ knows this – or at least the part of the world that actually chooses to pay attention to Phil’s videos – and therefore both of them should have been more prepared. Specifically Phil.

Phil’s phone is dead.

Phil doesn’t know where he is.

Phil has no _idea_ where the last place he saw Dan was.

Phil’s lost.

Phil’s a 6ft tall man-child, and he’s definitely lost – in America, of all places.

So he sighs, and he makes his way backwards until he finds a nice enough looking security guard, and then he taps the man on his shoulder and says “Can you help me? I’m looking for my friend.”

\--

Dan’s just managed to make it all the way back to where they’d been dropped off when he hears the call over the PA system. “Can Dan Howell please come to the security desk? I repeat, can Dan Howell please come to the security desk?” and all he can do is snort because _really Phil? Really?_

Shopping bags in hand, Dan leisurely makes his way back to the security desk he’d passed maybe 5 minutes ago, humming tunelessly to himself in an attempt to keep himself from bursting out into laughter because his best friend, his _boyfriend_ , had not only been silly enough to get lost, but had been forced to ask a security guard for help.

And they all knew the derision he’d faced the last time that’d happened.

When Dan does make it to the security desk, he finds a very sheepish looking Phil standing awkwardly next to a very small security guard, and just manages to stop himself from face-palming.

“Hi, Phil,” he says with a chuckle.

“Hey, Dan,” Phil replies.

The security guard glances between them, snorts, and then leaves.

“Nice one,” Dan comments, reaching out to link elbow’s with Phil’s. “Maybe you should just hold on to me for the rest of the night.”

“Hey! I’m not a child!” Phil complains, but he doesn’t unlink their arms. Dan laughs, and turns to quickly peck Phil on the cheek, dragging him along behind him as he makes his way back to the novelty shop he’d meant to go in earlier.

Yeah, Phil’s a giant dork who gets lost in shopping centers, but Dan doesn’t mind so much. The two laugh their way through the rest of the trip, Phil trying and failing to hide his face in embarrassment when he regale’s the tale of his conversation with the security guard, and Dan kisses his blush away.

They link hand’s when they think no one is looking, and share whispered conversations over awkward objects they find in joke shop’s, and Dan makes sure not to lose Phil again.


	8. Adoption

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Phil have been approved for adoption, and spend the day buying furniture and painting their son’s new room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : how about one where they get approved to adopt, and they're picking out stuff for the baby/kid's room? And like, fluff and all that good stuf too! Thanks! (Love your writing btw) ^_^
> 
> So I got two adoption related prompts, and decided to make a two shot out of it! I hope neither of you mind. Also this was the cutest prompt ever, and hopefully I do it justice. Thank you so much for the prompt lunala-ships-and-stuff, and I’m so glad you enjoy my writing ^.^
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

“He’s a teenager, Dan, not a baby,” Phil says as Dan wanders through the baby rooms in Ikea, eyes wide in fascination and wonderment.

“I _know_ that, Phil, but I just can’t help it, look at how cute everything is,” Dan responds, a faint blush appearing on his cheeks at the odd looks his words get him from the young mom’s around him. Phil smiles in agreement, and watches as he makes his way over to a room completely decked out in pink. The crib is even outlined with little pink flowers, and Dan has begun to run his fingers along its pristine edges.

He looks up at Phil, glee in his eyes, but before he can say anything, Phil cuts him off. “We are _not_ getting a baby! We just got approved for adoption, Dan! And we already decided on a teenager. A _specific_ teenager; a teenager we’ve been spending quite a lot of time with over the last few months, remember?”

“But _Phiiiiil_ ,” Dan whines with pleading eyes, hands making awkward sweeping gestures as he tries to show off the baby girl’s room.

“No Dan,” Phil responds, putting his foot down. “You and I both agreed, way before we started this thing, that we weren’t ready to care for a baby. Besides, do you really want to disappoint Adam if we call the agency back and tell them we’ve changed our mind? How do you think that’s going to sit on your conscience, our record? You think we’ll ever get approved for adoption again if we don’t even go through with our first one?”

Phil’s breathing is heavy by the end of his rant, true fear in his heart at the idea of leaving Adam behind and never getting another chance to adopt again. He’s starting to panic, and he knows it’s silly, but he’d just been so happy this morning when they’d gotten the call. He can’t imagine taking it back now, and Dan just looks so keen on a little girl all of a sudden, a _baby_ , a tiny being that Phil is certain he’d screw up taking care of.

He doesn’t have to worry long, though, because suddenly Dan is rushing over to him and pulling him into a hug.

“Hey, hey, calm down, Phil. I didn’t mean now, I just meant in the future. Of course I’m not changing my mind on Adam, he’s a wonderful boy. Now come on, let’s move along before someone gets the wrong idea,” Dan soothes, rubbing little circles into his back. Phil pulls away, breathing still rather erratic, but nods his head in agreement.

As they start to make their way into the kids rooms, Phil glances around himself, only to find the odd scattering of parents sending him odd looks. His breathing is still heavy, so he ducks his head to try and avoid anymore unnecessary attention.

They’re here to pick out some items for their new son’s bedroom, there’s nothing wrong with that.

\--

By the time they get home, Dan and Phil have picked out a nice, beige desk that will take up the majority of one wall, a bed at least the size of their own, and an oak dresser long enough to fit a TV on top if Adam decides he wants one in his room.

Before they can get started, however, they need to build all of this. And before that, they have to break out the paint and coat the walls in a new color.

Blue, by request of Adam.

They lay out a tarp all over the bedroom floor, pull on their oldest pair of jeans and ratty old t-shirts, and then they get started. Their arms are pressed together as they tease each other, laughing like children as they attempt to paint the same wall together. 15 minutes in, and Phil’s already got a long streak of blue down his cheek where Dan had decided it would be a good idea to take a swipe at Phil.

Phil threatens back with his own paintbrush, but Dan is having none of it as he as scrambles away to the other side of the all.

“Yeah, you better run!” Phil mutters, turning back to his job.

They’re quiet for a while, getting the job done at a steady pace, and then, seemingly out of nowhere, a wet glob of paint finds its way stinging down Phil’s neck. He yelps, and turns around, only to find a laughing Dan curled up in hysterics on the floor.

The war is on.

Phil dips his paintbrush in the paint can, bringing up his own glob of paint and flinging it at Dan, catching the younger just on the ear as he rolls away. Dan yelps, rolling to a standing position, but is unable to dodge the next glob of paint Phil sends his way. It splatters against his chest, soaking through his t-shirt, and he shouts “Oh, you’re on now!”

Then they’re really fighting, laughing as they run around the room. Dan has the advantage, having picked up the spare paintbrush and dipping it in the paint as well, but Phil doesn’t care as he runs past an open paint can and picks it up.

“Woah, wooah there, Phil! You better not be about to do what I –“

In the next second, Dan’s entire upper body is covered in blue paint, and Phil is in tears from laughing so hard. Dan flutters his eyes against the dripping paint, and spits out what’s managed to get in his mouth, and then he’s tackling Phil to the floor. Phil lands with an “oomf.”

Dan makes sure to get his revenge.

\--

By 4o’clock that morning, they’ve managed to finish painting and building Adam’s new furniture. They don’t press any of it up against the wall where they mean to place it, for obvious reasons, but they’re both exhausted and excited to finally take Adam home two days from now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think you’re intent was them to be excited and talking about their new child, but I ended up writing kind of fluffy fighting in Adam’s room.


	9. Adam is Dil (but not really)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil comes to the realization that he and Dan have adopted someone very similar to their sim creation, Dil Howtler.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : can you do one where they adopt a kid but not a baby like a teenager and he ends up being a LOT like Dil from their Sims series... like almost exactly the same...
> 
> Just as nicolewithnosoul prompted, and a continuation of yesterday – meet Adam!
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

They bring Adam home, all awkward, gangly limbs as he follows behind Dan and Phil with his luggage. It’s less that he’s shy, and more that he’s easily embarrassed, but the minute he steps foot in their apartment, it’s clear that he’s completely in awe of it. Phil reckons it has more to do with him being unable to believe he’s actually been adopted than the splendor of his new home, and that makes his heart ache.

“This is your room. We painted it blue, just like you wanted, and got you started with some furniture, including a desk. We’re working on getting you your own desktop, but for now, you can just use mine,” Dan is saying, gesturing around Adam’s new bedroom with a happy grin on his face.

Adam steps in, and they both wait anxiously in the doorway for his reaction. Gleeful smiles light up their face when Adam turns back around with a grateful look on his face.

“Thank you, it’s perfect.”

\--

It’s not until a month later that Phil begins to notice something a little odd. Don’t get him wrong, Adam is a pleasure to have around. He’s grateful for everything Dan and Phil have to offer him, and there’s even excitement in his face when they mention him going to school.

The real strangeness stems from the way he behaves. His mannerisms and bad habits remind Phil of someone, but he can’t quite put his finger on it.

At first he thinks it’s him. Adam is strangely similar to him in that he often forgets to close the cupboard doors, but more than that, he’s taken to eating dry cereal in the middle of the night when he thinks everyone else is asleep.

On top of that, Adam has a nasty habit of allowing his dishes to pile up in his room, and by the time he brings them downstairs, it’s clear they’ll need at least a day’s soaking to come clean.

He’s also incredibly klutzy, more so even than Dan. He’s more likely to do what Phil has done multiple times and nearly fall down the stairs than he is to drop things, but he’s definitely also got Dan’s butterfingers.

Then Phil wonders if it’s not Dan. He’s got the same sleeping habits, and whenever Dan isn’t playing video games, Adam is. The home desktop is quickly becoming overrun with video games that Dan and Adam take turns playing. Phil’s even filmed it a few times, and they often show up in his video’s, usually arguing over the best skills for each character.

One morning, Phil comes downstairs to find Adam attempting to make pancakes, and failing miserably as he flips one right out of the pan. Watching Adam cook with a smile on his face brings the name of whomever he reminds Phil of to the tip of his tongue, but it’s not until Adam’s at school and Dan and Phil are filming a new Sim’s video with Dil that it suddenly hits him.

“It’s Dil!” he suddenly shouts, a triumphant smile on his face.

“...yes Phil, that’s Dil, right in front of us,” Dan retorts, eyebrows raised. Phil shakes his head.

“No, Adam! He keep’s reminding me of someone, only I couldn’t think of who, and now I know! It’s Dil! We adopted Dil!”

Dan stares at him, mouth open in realization, and then they both collapse into laughter.

\--

It’s true. Adam has the same dark shade of brown hair that Dil has, and the same green eyes. He’s almost as tall as Dan and Phil, and his features are sort of a mix of their own in the same strange way that Dil’s are.

He’s clumsy, and he’s a geek, but most of all, he’s Dan and Phil’s son. 


	10. Command Me to Be Well

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan’s parents find out he’s gay, and they send him to conversion therapy. **Abuse, Suicide**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil, nor do I own the song Take Me to Church
> 
>  _Prompt_ : Can you do a song fic for Take Me to Church by Hozier? Please and thank you!
> 
> I played with a different style a bit here, because I really wanted to capture the essence of the song, but I’m not sure you guys will like it. I had fun though! Uhm, for the most part. **_Please head the warnings!_** I honestly didn’t think I’d be doing another character death fic...
> 
> Slightly happier sequel [here.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3228437)
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

They were never supposed to find out. It was supposed to be his little secret, something he knew he’d never be able to share with his parents, but they’d messed up. They hadn’t been careful enough, and now his parents knew.

Now his parents knew and nothing would ever be the same again.

\--

There last moments together are behind Dan’s house, pressed up together in a tight hug. Phil promises he’ll never stop loving Dan.

\--

They send him to conversion therapy. The priests are angry with him. Mostly they just yell.

The other boys stare at him with broken looks while he waits his turn, all forced to kneel with large gaps of space between them.

He doesn’t want to become like them. He keeps imagining Phil’s face in his head, and it keeps him going.

He does everything they say, because Phil told him that’s the only way to get out.

\--

“We caught them in bed together,” his dad sneers, and the priest turns his piercing eyes on Dan.

Dan doesn’t look at him. His mind is on the moment’s he’d spent in Phil’s arms.

“Well, we’ll just have to take care of that, won’t we?”

\--

They’d rolled together under the sheets, Phil’s name on Dan’s lips, the sweet scent of him still lingering in his nose. He remembers the feel of his sharp hips under his palms, and the sound of his moans in his ear.

Their hips snapped together at a steady rhythm, Dan’s hands scrabbling at Phil’s back. The sweet pleasure of release, a heady rush in Dan’s mind.

\--

It starts as a daily thing. Dan’s parents can’t even look at him. His mum cries every time he enters the room, and his Dad glares at nothing.

Dan walks around with hunched shoulders, and a forced dead look in his eye.

\--

He doesn’t remember their harsh words. They echo in his ears, but he lets them go. He knows what they think of him, and the sharp sting of a paddle on his backside is enough of a sour memory. He wonders how Phil’s doing.

Dan hasn’t been back to school in weeks. He was born sick, he heard them say it. He’s never going back.

\--

“Enough of this! You like women!” they command, voices harsh in his head, and he nods slowly, numb to the pain.

\--

It becomes a weekly thing, instead. He kneels each Sunday at the feet of the pastor, head bowed as he listens to him preach. His hands are tied – not literally, but it’s real enough.

“Amen!” he says when prompted, like a knife at his throat.

\--

They find him a nice Catholic girl. They hold hands and go on dates.

Dan chokes back the tears when he sees Phil. They’re constantly chaperoned, so he can’t go to him, but Phil’s watery smile is painful enough.

\--

The church offers him no absolution. He’ll sin to his dying breathe.

\--

The knife is cold in his fingers, and the blood warm as he lets go.

He still remembers the comfort of Phil’s fingers entwined with his own, and imagines his love holding him close.

_In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene / Only then I am Human / Only then I am Clean_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m officially full up on drabble prompts, so any new prompt I receive will be written outside of this “challenge.” If you already sent a prompt before today, don’t stress, you’re fine!


	11. Driving Lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil offers to teach Dan to drive, forgetting, in the moment, that he’s a terrible driver. |

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : Phil offers to teach Dan how to drive
> 
> For a friend. Have some humor and fun to make up for *cough* yesterday *cough*
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

“Please, Dan, can’t you stay just _one_ more day?”

“You know I want to, Phil, but I’ve got to get back. Dad promised a driving lesson, and you know I was hoping to get my license before I start university in the Fall!”

“I’ll teach you then!” Phil blurts out before he can stop himself, desperate to spend just one more day with Dan considering the price of the ticket just to come North for a few days.

Dan quirks an eyebrow at him. “Really?”

“Yeah, I’m a great teacher!” Phil says, and the words are coming like word-vomit now. Phil just can’t stop.

Dan laughs at that. “What, you mean like that time you taught me to finger myself over Skype?”

Phil’s face colors at the memory, the whole affair a complete failure on his part.

“That’s not fair, that was over webcam! How was I supposed to know you would completely skip over the lube, even though I _told_ you it was important!”

Dan rolls his eyes, conceding by bowing his head. “Fine. Do you really think you could help me out, then? My driving test is next Thursday.”

“Yeah, yeah of course!” Phil says, but his hands are shaking because he knows the minute they get behind the wheel, everything is going to go to shit.

\--

“Alright, so you drive with one foot, not both –“

“Phil, I know that already.”

“Okay, sorry, I was just making sure! So, right, if you push this, then your blinker should come on-“

“Phil, those are the windshield wipers.”

“Sorry, sorry, like this!” Phil says, trying again, and sighs in relief when the blinker finally does come on. There’s stress weighing heavy on his heart, and he’s doing everything he can to keep them from _actually_ moving, because he’s afraid he’s only going to make things worse, but his attempts keep dissolving into him quickly embarrassing himself by doing everything wrong. Finally, he gives up.

“What do you need me to help you with, then?”

“Parking…and just being there. I can’t drive on the streets without someone with a license in the car with me. So I was thinking I could drive us to an empty parking lot and you can help me from there.”

“Okay, let’s get started then. Turn the keys in the ignition,” Phil sighs, settling back awkwardly in his seat with his hands balled into fists on his lap.

“You okay, Phil? I’m not a terrible driver, I’m not going to kill us,” Dan says, glancing at Phil with a worried expression on his face. Phil smiles at him and concentrates on unballing his fists.

“I know. I trust you,” he says. _It’s me I don’t trust._

Dan turns away, and the engine roars to life on Phil’s old, beat up car. Then they’re moving, and Phil’s heart is racing because in just a moment, they’ll be in a parking lot where Dan is going to ask for advice that Phil won’t have to give.

The car trundles along, and Dan makes his first turn, wheels bumping slightly into the pavement. He turns a sheepish grin on Phil before continuing along his way, confident behind the wheel in a way that Phil will never be.

They continue on that way with Phil sitting ramrod straight besides Dan, heart thumping in his chest. They’re on the street, and Phil is petrified. He has no idea what he’s doing, and all he can think about is how bad of a driver he personally is.

The light is red when Dan reaches out to pat him on the leg.

“It’s okay Phil, I just need some practice, okay? You don’t have to worry so much.”

Phil only nods in response, and Dan takes the hint to continue on his way. Finally, after about ten minutes of silence, Dan pulls into an empty parking lot and gets out of the car. When Phil sends him a confused look, Dan just says “I learn better by watching.”

 _This is it, the moment of truth_ , Phil thinks, getting out of the car then and switching sides with Dan.

He grips the wheel awkwardly, turns the keys in the ignition, and starts to drive.

The first time he accidentally hits the curb, he throws Dan an anxious look, noting that his boyfriend is staring straight ahead. Slowly, he attempts to straighten out, all the while babbling instructions and explaining what he’s doing, but it all comes out a jumbled mess.

While straightening the car out, Phil manages to once again hit the curb, and that’s when he finally breaks.

“I can’t drive!” he shouts, breathing heavy as he throws the car into park. Dan just stares at him.

“I know,” Dan states. Phil stares at him.

“You know?”

“I figured it out pretty much as soon as we got in the car, but I figured I’d let you fess up,” Dan continues. Phil drops his head onto the steering wheel and groans.

“It would have been fine, you know? I just needed someone experienced in the car, but it would have been nice if you hadn’t tried to lie to me,” Dan says, and finally, his face melts into a smile.

“You silly git!” he says, and Phil finally dissolves into laughter, tears streaming down his face out of relief.

“Let’s stick to the things you’re actually good at, shall we?” Dan says.

“Like what?”

“Like this,” he continues, pressing up close to Phil and allowing their mouths to come together in a gentle kiss. His hand cups the back of Phil’s head, and Phil melts into it, beginning to laugh against Dan’s lips in reaction to the absurdity of the whole situation.

Dan pulls away to laugh with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I shouldn't attempt to be funny.


	12. The World is Ugly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan’s parents can’t accept him, and fight about it every night. Usually, Dan goes to Phil for comfort, but soon, he knows that too will be taken away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : a drabble based off The World Is Ugly by My Chemical Romance
> 
> As always, wolvesgomoomoo reminds me why I love MCR. Also, I REALLY love this song.
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

It’s happening again. They’re screaming downstairs, voices raised to the point where Dan can hear them through the walls.

He often wonders what their neighbors think of them, but the thought just makes him feel worse, so he tucks it away for later. For never.

They’re fighting over him, he knows. They’re always fighting over him. What to do with him. What to think of him. Where they went wrong, whose fault is it.

Dan can’t take it. He can’t stand it, so he sneaks out the window, undoing the latch and crawling across the ledge until he can fall into the bushes relatively unscathed.

He never considers how hard it’s going to be to get back in. It’s a problem for another day.

\--

“Dan!” Phil shout whispers, worry evident in his eyes as he leans out his window, taking in Dan’s shivering form. “What are you doing here? Are you okay?” he calls. Dan shakes his head no, and Phil disappears, only to reappear downstairs at the front door.

Dan follows him inside, every the quiet one as the sneak back upstairs. Phil’s family is already asleep. Sometimes Dan forgets how late it is when his parents start fighting.

They settle comfortably on Phil’s bed, lying side by side while they stare at Phil’s ceiling. They don’t speak, but Phil does reach out to hold his hand, the way he always does when something’s wrong with Dan.

“Are your parents fighting again?” Phil finally asks when it’s been quite too long.

“Yeah,” Dan responds, voice quiet. “Over me…just like every other time.”

Phil hums in response, dragging his thumb against Dan’s skin in a comforting way.

“I’m sorry. I was hoping…”

“Yeah, me too,” Dan says, already knowing exactly what Phil had planned to say. “But I don’t think it’s ever going to happen.”

Dan’s parents are never going to accept him, and that’s that.

They’re quiet again, for a short time, and then Dan rolls so his face is tucked into Phil’s chest. Phil wraps his arms around Dan’s shaking form, and exhales shakily himself.

“Dan-“

“What am I going to do when you’ve gone away?” Dan interrupts, tears in his throat. Phil gulps and pulls Dan tighter to him.

“You’re not going to let them win, that’s what you’re going to do,” Phil whispers into Dan’s hair, one hand stroking the strands softly. “You’re going to call me and cry on the phone to me, just like you used to do.”

“It’s not the same.”

“I know, Dan, I know. But listen. Listen to me now, okay? The world might be ugly, but you are _always_ going to be beautiful to me. You are _always_ going to be perfect. Don’t you dare change for anyone, I don’t think I’d ever be able to forgive you if you did that. Not even for your parents, okay? Not even for me,” Phil says, and his voice is serious and stern. Dan shivers in his hold, poking his head up to look at his best friend.

Phil is staring at him, and his eyes are soft despite his expression being hard, and Dan just can’t help himself. He props himself up and he kisses him, soft and insistent.

With all of the love in his heart.

Phil kisses him back, and that’s all he really needed to know.

They pull away and rest their foreheads against each other.

“I promise I won’t change for anyone. And in one year, I’ll be at University with you.”

“And we can live together, so you’ll never have to be alone again. Would you like that, Dan?”

“Yeah…I think I’d like that a lot,” he says with a smile in his heart.


	13. Me or Her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Phil don’t fight often, but this time, Dan’s ex-girlfriend just won’t get out of the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : I honesty don't think that there are enough fanfiction about Dan and Phil having a fight. Can you make a fanfiction about them arguing about something (not a small fight; a huge arguement)
> 
> I got two very similar prompts because I apparently you guys like them to fight, so look out for something similar soon! Also, I hope this was what you were looking for? I originally planned for it to be an angsty ending, but then this happened. Still, I think that’s more than just a small fight. 
> 
> Also, wow, we’re almost done here. Three days to go!
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

They don’t fight often; not really anyway. Usually it’s just about little things, and even then, they laugh if it off. Neither of them are all that willing to take themselves too seriously – it’s kind of part of their job description, and something that just kind of echoes back into their personal lives.

They don’t mind. They like it that way.

But sometimes, and they really do mean _sometimes_ , they get into a real fight. An argument that escalates past the point of something they can just laugh off. Sometimes, things get serious, and the two of them find themselves at opposite corners of the room flinging insults at one another.

It’s never over something silly. No, these fights are reserved for the serious stuff – the deep stuff that so often gets swept under the rug because they just aren’t ready to deal with it yet, and tonight, that’s over an ex-girlfriend that really shouldn’t be in the picture anymore.

“It’s not that hard, Dan! Just stopping seeing her!” Phil shouts.

“She’s just a friend, Phil! It’s not going to kill you if we hang out from time to time!” Dan shouts back.

Phil doesn’t answer, just releases a loud groan, covering his face in frustration. When he pulls his hands away, his face is covered in tears.

Dan’s face melts into one of concern as he takes a step forward in an attempt to comfort.

“Wha…? Phil? What the hell?”

“Just stop, Dan. I’ve seen the fucking texts, I know she keep’s trying to get you back!” Phil spits, the tears warm on his cheeks.

Dan’s face shuts down.

“You’ve been reading my texts?”

“It’s hard to resist when your boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend texts you _constantly_ , _teasing_ you, _taunting_ you, _encouraging_ you to check over his texts!” Phil shouts, breathing heavy as more tears drip down his face. “I just…I couldn’t help it, Dan. She wouldn’t _stop,_ ” he tries, body sagging so that he has to lean up against the wall to keep him upright.

Dan rushes over to him, then, no longer caring that they’re in the middle of a fight, and takes him into his arms, rubbing his back.

“Shhh, baby, okay, I understand. I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I thought…I thought she’d eventually stop, if I just kept turning her down. I never thought – I never _imagined_ that she’d go to you, try and sabotage us…”

Phil sniffles, finally reciprocating Dan’s hug, and relaxes.

“I can’t do this anymore, Dan. It’s me or her,” he mutters, squeezing his eyes shut in fear of Dan’s response.

“Always you, baby. Always you.”


	14. My Downstairs Neighbor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil accidentally destroys the floor of his bathroom, forcing him and his downstairs neighbor to technically share a bathroom until it can be fixed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : Phil leaves the bath running, causing the room to flood and destroying the floor. The bathroom is still usable other than a large hole that looks down on his Dan’s bathroom. At some point, Phil takes a shower and drops his shower snack on Dan’s head.
> 
> My boyfriend has been obsessed with the idea of Phil’s shower snacks since he watched that gaming video with me, and so it’s no surprise that this is what he prompted me.
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

It’s honestly something that would only happen to Phil, isn’t it? To forget he turned the bathtub on, and not only flood his entire apartment, but destroy and crumble the floor, leaving a gaping hole from his bathroom to his downstairs neighbors.

“I promise I’ll pay for any inconvenience and damage this might have caused you,” Phil pleads, cheeks flushed pink in embarrassment. “I am so, so sorry.”

The man in front of him only nods, a very obvious, disgruntled look on his face as he leans against the door frame.

Phil can barely look at him. Not only is this the only neighbor he hasn’t spoken to before, it’s also the neighbor he’s had a secret crush on since he moved in.

“When did the landlord say he’d have it fixed again?” the man asks.

“…two weeks, tops,” Phil replies, mortified.

The man nods again, and then, with a deep sigh, offers Phil his hand. Phil stares, confused, but takes it anyway, shaking it carefully.

“I’m Dan. Figure if we’re going to be spending a lot of…quality time together in the coming weeks, we might as well know each other’s names,” he says, and from the way he say’s quality, Phil’s cheeks redden anew.

“Right. I’m Phil,” he introduces himself. “And I promise I’ll uh…knock before entering, or something.”

“Right. See ya.”

The door closes, and Phil is left standing awkwardly in the hallway, suddenly very aware of the fact that he’s technically going to be sharing a bathroom with his downstairs neighbor for the next two weeks.

\--

“Dan! Please hurry up, I really need to go. I don’t think I can hold it any longer!” Phil shouts through the bathroom door, waddling in place as he tries to keep himself from pissing his pants.

“Then just come in!” Dan shouts back, clearly annoyed.

“But-"

“I don’t care anymore, if it’ll stop your bitching, than come in!”

So Phil does, throwing the door open with a bang and skirting the large hole in the bathroom floor. As he unzips his pants and stands in front of the toilet, he can only thank God that there’s at least 3 feet between the hole and the toilet.

A moment later, Dan calls out again.

“I thought you had to pee.”

“I do.”

“Then pee and get out.”

“I can’t…I uh, I have a shy bladder,” Phil mumbles back, eyes squeezed shut in embarrassment again, willing his bladder to release. Of course, it doesn’t. Dan sighs heavily beneath him.

“Would it help if I turned up the sound on my game?” he finally calls back, and Phil shouts back a hurried yes.

In the next moment, Pokemon Music fills the room, and with a relieved sigh, Phil is able to pee.

As he’s leaving, however, he shouts over his shoulder, “Nice taste in games!” and slams the door shut behind him before Dan can answer.

\--

It’s been a week now, and though things haven’t gotten any easier, things have gotten a little less awkward between Phil and his downstairs neighbor. They’d created a kind of system of knocking to use the restroom, and if one person was in the shower, than the other could come in as long as the water was on. Once it turned off, however, they had a minute to finish and leave.

The biggest upside was that the fact that the two had been forced to start talking more through this system. Often, if one of them was showering, and the other was getting ready for bed or ready for the day, they’d spend that time talking to each other rather than awkwardly sharing the space.

They had a lot in common. Dan kept inviting Phil downstairs to play Mario cart, but Phil remained too embarrassed to face him. Phil wasn’t too embarrassed to taunt him, though, and their conversations often quickly dissolved into arguing over who was better at what.

They had still yet to sit down and settle those bets.

“I bet the only reason you refuse to come downstairs is because you know I really _would_ kick your ass at all these games,” Dan taunts.

“No! I’m just busy,” Phil shoots back from the shower. Dan scoffs.

“Bullshit, we share a bathroom. I know you spend all your time at home.”

“I work from home!”

“Yeah, and you also work on your own time. If you had any balls, you’d get your ass down here and prove that you can beat me!”

Phil knows Dan’s right, but he’s also unwilling to admit it, so instead, he leans out of the shower to say “Fine, I’ll come down tonight then!” at the same time as he tries to agitatedly put a grape in his mouth.

The grape falls, and Phil watches as it hits Dan in the head.

Dan looks up. Their eyes catch, and Phil suddenly realizes that his entire body is on full view. He scrambles back into the shower, cheeks red.

Dan clears his throat.

“What the hell was that?”

“…a shower snack,” Phil says back.

“A shower snack,” Dan questions, deadpan.

“Yes,” Phil says again. They both steadfastly refuse to acknowledge the fact that Dan had just seen Phil completely naked as the room falls silent.

“Right then,” Dan finally says. “You’re coming over tonight, then?” he asks.

“Yeah,” Phil replies.

“Then it’s a date,” Dan says, and before Phil can even think of responding, he hears the bathroom door shut below him. His cheeks flare red again, but he can’t help but smile to himself as he finishes his shower.

\--

A few hours later, he finds himself pressed into the cushions of Dan’s couch with a very insistent brunet hovering over him, lips attached to his neck. 


	15. Communication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil is sick of having to hide his relationship with Dan from Dan’s parents, and confronts Dan about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : could you write a drabble about Dan and Phil arguing after Phil's had a few drinks, and Phil storming out for an hour? Dan would miss Phil and realise how much he means to him, and Phil would come home having calmed down so lots of cute phan fluff could happen. Thanks!
> 
> Okay, so I didn’t realize until after I finished it that I fucked up and didn’t do the prompt correctly, but then I kind of really liked this one? So I thought I’d just…post it…anyway...and I could always do your prompt again if you like, justphillingin. Sorry about that. Sometimes I fuck up. I actually fuck up a lot. 
> 
> LAST DAY TOMORROW DEARS <3 THANK YOU FOR ALL THE SUPPORT!
> 
> Kudos keep me alive!

“It’s been two years, Dan!” Phil shouts, voice echoing in the quiet apartment. “Two years since we started dating, and your parents _still_ think we’re just best friends. I mean, are you really that ashamed of me?”

“What, no, of course not!” Dan shouts back, hurt at his words. “I’m just scared! My parents don’t even know I’m _gay_ yet, and you want me to spring my relationship on them?”

Phil groans, and crosses his arms over his chest. “Of course not, but it’s been _two years_ , Dan! I’m sick of feeling like a dirty little secret every time your family comes over. I mean shit, what am I going to do when they start pestering you to get married? Watch as you bring home fake girlfriends just to keep up this ridiculous charade?” Phil asks.

“That’s not going to happen, Phil!”

“How do you know? I’ve heard you mum, Dan. I know she want’s grandchildren. Eventually, she’s going to start asking!”

“Yeah, but I’m not going to lie to my family!”

“That’s the thing, _you already are!”_ Phil shouts, throwing his hands in the air. “You already fucking are! Sometimes, your dad gives me weird looks, because he just can’t understand why too grown men are still living together. Do you know how that makes me feel? Half the time I think he blames me for why you don’t have a girlfriend, and the worst part is, he’s right, because _I’m your boyfriend_ , but no one knows that!”

“That’s not true,” Dan demands. “All our friends know!”

“Yeah, but what about the people who kind of fucking matter in the long run! I’d like to be able to be a part of your family at some point, Dan!”

It’s Dan’s turn to groan at that, and he finally turns his back on Phil, whose face is scrunched up in pure agitation at this point.

“Phil…I’m just…I’m not ready, okay?”

“Not ready for what!?”

“To tell my family I’m gay, alright!? I’m already a huge disappointment…” Dan responds.

“Yeah, well what does that make me then? You’re secret fucking shame?” Phil spits. The words are so shocking, Dan spins around, face devastated.

“What?” Dan asks. “No, of course not! How could you even say that, Phil?”

“Because that’s exactly how you make me feel,” he hisses, and this time, it’s his turn to turn his back.

The room is tense, silent, Phil fuming in one corner while Dan sulks in the other.

“Phil-“ Dan begins.

“You know what? No, just forget it. I’m done,” Phil says, cutting him off, and then he’s storming out of the room, keys in hand. Dan doesn’t even have a chance to run after him, he’s so stunned. The front door slams, and Dan’s suddenly all alone, Phil’s final words resting painfully on his mind.

He sits down then, legs trembling, and puts his face in his hands with a loud groan.

 _What am I going to do now,_ he thinks.

\--

Part of Dan is scared out of his mind that Phil isn’t going to come back, and part of him knows that Phil just needed some time to cool down. Some time apart.

Still, his hands are trembling as he sits in the lounge, two hours later, scared out of his mind that he’s ruined everything. That he’s ruined literally the best thing that has ever happened to his life.

His phone in his hand, the volume turned up as loud as he can make it, hoping for a call, a text, _anything_ , just to let him know that Phil is alright. He doesn’t want to interrupt him though, by texting him himself, so he doesn’t. He just waits, not so patiently, for Phil to come back.

There are tear tracks on his face. He’d spent the first hour choking back sobs, and the second taking deep breaths. Now he’s okay again. His mind is made up. He just needs to talk to Phil, to make it all okay again.

Suddenly, he hears a key in the lock, and before he can stop himself, he jumps up from his seat on the couch and races down the stairs, launching himself into Phil’s arms before the older man has even managed to shut the door.

Phil’s strong arms wrap around him in return, holding him close, and Dan finally allows himself to relax.

They hug for a good few minutes before Phil finally pulls away.

“We should talk,” he says quietly, voice hoarse. Dan nods his head.

“Yeah,” he replies, allowing Phil to pull him back up the stairs and into the lounge.

They sit down side by side, bodies slightly turned to face each other, but before Phil can open his mouth and say anything, Dan blurts out “I’m sorry.”

“No Bear, _I’m_ sorry…I shouldn’t have shouted at you like that. I understand…coming out is hard, and every person has to take it at their own pace. I should have been more supportive,” Phil says.

Dan shakes his head, a rueful smile on his face. “Maybe…but I never even considered how this could have been affecting you, and that’s not fair of me. I didn’t realize how badly I’d made you feel, with this whole situation. I just – we should have…I should have made sure we were talking about it, instead of just sweeping it under the rug,” Dan says, taking Phil’s hands in his.

“Look, I’m not ready to come out just yet, Phil, but I promise you, _I promise you_ , you are not my secret shame. I love you. With all of my heart. And sometime soon, I’ll work up the courage to tell my parents, but for now, can you just hug me again?” he asks, eyes starting to water once again. Phil smiles at him, and takes him into his arms.

“Of course Bear…we’ll take it one day a time.”


	16. Re-Creation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan accidentally spills coffee on one of Phil’s drawings, and, in an attempt to make it up to him, tries his hand at re-drawing it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil
> 
>  _Prompt_ : Phil draws. Dan accidentally spills coffee on one of Phil's drawings and is scared of the consequences. Very fluffy as Phil reassures him that it's ok. :3
> 
> Hey guys! So it looks like we’ve reached the end of this journey together, and I’ve come to notice a few traditions. There is always one MCR prompt, one crack fic from my boyfriend, and one more serious prompt from my one rl friend who caused me to ship this in the first place. Honestly, I never want that to change, so hopefully you’ll see me back again sometime and our traditions can stand. Anyway, as always, thank you so much for all of your support, and I should be seeing your very soon with some other projects!
> 
> Notes keep me alive!

He really hadn’t meant too. It was an accident, and in his defense, Phil really shouldn’t leave his sketches scattered around the house the way he did. Dan hadn’t had a clue there was a hidden piece of paper lying under the pile of magazines and miscellaneous crap (which was another problem of Phil’s) on the coffee table.

It was definitely his fault he’d spilled his cup of coffee in the first place, though. He knew that. But maybe he would have been more careful if he’d known something as special and important as one of Phil’s sketches was there.

Dan wanted so badly to cling onto his excuses, but in the end, he had no one to blame but himself. This wouldn’t even be such a problem if he wasn’t so afraid of Phil’s reaction.

See, Phil wasn’t a violent person, nor was he a particularly angry one, but boy was his biggest weapon that face he made when he was disappointed. Dan hated to see that face – somehow, Dan would rather be screamed at.

So he scrambled for something to clean up his mess with the moment he caught sight of the little white edge, pawing at the damp sheet of paper, only to smear the delicate sketch with each swipe. The dark brown liquid of his drink had ran across the table, sinking underneath magazines and soaking into the fiber of the drawing, leaving it ruined beyond repair.

The moment the paper ripped in his hands, Dan’s eyes started to water.

Oh, how he hated disappointing his boyfriend.

\--

“Hey, Dan? Do you know where my sketchpad went? I thought I left it in the bedroom, but it’s not in there!” Phil calls as he makes his way upstairs to the office, where light is peeking out underneath the door frame. When he gets no response, he knocks at the door and places his ear up against the wood.

“Just a minute!” Dan shouts at him, and, wondering why in the world Dan wouldn’t just tell him to come in, Phil tries the doorknob. It doesn’t budge, and he hears an anxious laugh on the other side.

“Go wait in the lounge, or something!” Dan shouts again, and Phil’s brow furrows, but he follows Dan’s direction and heads back downstairs.

15 minutes later, Phil finally hears a door open, and he sits up properly in confused anticipation.

“Dan?”

“I’m coming down.”

The sound of shuffling paper follows Dan’s words, and it’s then that Phil remembers the reason he’d gone looking for Dan in the first place. For a moment, he feels anxious at the thought of someone else touching his sketchpad, but then he realizes that it’s just Dan. Dan, who knows how much Phil treasures it. Dan, who knows how much Phil’s art means to him.

He settles back in the couch cushions and waits.

Dan turns the corner, sketchpad open but pressed to his chest like he’s waiting to reveal something.

“Look, I fucked up okay? I may have accidentally spilled my coffee on a sketch you left down here earlier, and I tried to salvage it, but I hadn’t even known it was there in the first place,” Dan quickly says in one breath.

Phil stares, confused, but doesn’t interrupt when he sees that Dan isn’t done.

“I know it’s kind of stupid, and it’s not the same thing…but, well, as soon as I got it to dry, I thought…maybe I could re-create it for you?” Dan says, the pitch of his voice rising in anxiety at the end. Phil just nods, still confused, and watches as his boyfriend takes a deep breath before finally turning the sketchpad around.

On it, Phil finds a badly crumpled, brown stained sheet of lined paper taped in the top corner, and under it, a meticulously, but shakily, drawn re-creation.

The piece itself is simple – just two hands interlocked. One hand is slightly bigger than the other (though in the re-creation, it’s quite a bit bigger), while the other is longer and thinner.

Phil can’t help but burst into laughter when he sees it. Dan’s brow furrows, face crumpling, and Phil scrambles to pull himself together.

“Dan, were you seriously worried about that?”

The brunet only nods, and Phil laughs again. He stands up to gently take the sketchpad out of Dan’s hands, then places it gently behind him on the couch and takes Dan into his arms.

“Oh Dan, don’t you recognize my sketches anymore? It was just something I had to get out of my system, no big deal really,” he says into the crook of Dan’s neck, and Dan noticeably relaxes into his hold, hugging Phil back.

“None of your work is just a sketch to me…it’s all special and perfect,” he mumbles back, squeezing Phil tighter to him. Phil smiles into his shoulder.

“Thank you, Bear,” he says in response, squeezing Dan to him tighter. 


End file.
